Critique

Though this site is dedicated to flash fiction and therefore the stories posted are not always meant to be fully polished, I am always open to comments about my writing. 

Examples
Which lines did you love/hate? 
Where did I mangle the English language? 
This character was unbelievable because...
Etc.

Constructive critisims will only make me better and give you better flash fiction to read.

Thank you!